Blogging While Paused

where video game characters speak out

Posted by Ganondorf On May - 11 - 2011 Comments Off

It may seem simple enough. You invade a country, capture a princess, things like that. But the things that you go through behind the scenes are hard.

Running Hyrule while some kid in a green tunic is ruining your plans is not simple. Especially when you go through all the trouble of releasing those things.

Have you ever tried to revive an ancient fire dragon while at the same time trying to organize your minions? Or release a monster amoeba to freeze a race of people under a block of ice?

It isn’t easy. And when the hero comes and destroys all the work you’ve done, it’s aggravating. There are a lot of times where I wish I could have just gone out to find Link before he had what it took to defeat me. But I was always busy with other things. If it wasn’t letting yet another monster out, it was making sure all of my minions were in the right place.

And there’s another thing. Building the dungeons. It’s costly. If not by money, by your resources. If I had my way, Link would have to go through a hundred dungeons before even thinking about being able to fight me.

You’d think that having taken over the land, you wouldn’t have to worry about how much money you’re using. But the workers refuse to give me anything without mind numbing prices! And I can’t just kill them because I can’t get all those resources myself!

And then building the places takes even more time! And once the hero gets in there, he starts destroying walls, killing all the minions I assigned to the place, and defeating the monster I had set free there! And don’t even get me started on my castle. Almost every time, I have to build it from scratch. And I have to make sure it’s menacing, but at the same time, elegant. It costs a lot to get so much red carpet to place on the stairs.

Categories: Complaint

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