Blogging While Paused

where video game characters speak out

Archive for May, 2011

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Not a great idea

Posted by KingDedede On May - 25 - 2011 Comments Off

All right, I’m willing to admit it. Let’s chalk the “Gourmet Race” up as one of my worst ideas ever. I thought I had everything set up nicely. I figured that my opponent would be distracted by all the food in such obscure places. That would give me a chance to run the straightest path to the goal and grab the moderate amount of stuff that was along the way. I made sure that winning the actual race was worth a lot more than just the food. The thing is, though, for a blob that does nothing but eat and float, Kirby is… a lot faster than you would think. He ate EVERYTHING! AND he won! Look at what it’s done to me! I’m burning a lot of energy out there with no food to make up for it! I must have lost at least 15 pounds since we started.  [ Read More ]

Categories: Chronicles
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Not a great idea

Posted by Kirby On May - 18 - 2011 Comments Off

Okay… So a Gourmet Race sounded like a good idea at first, but it turns out there’s some problems you wouldn’t think of until you try it… I love the idea of it–you run around and eat as much as you can in a competition. Should be great, right? Well, sometimes you have to eat things so quickly you don’t even get a chance to taste them. And considering how fast I like to eat, that’s saying something! The other problem is that once I eat, I usually like to take a second to… you know, enjoy it? Savor the taste, let it start to digest, stuff like that… You don’t get a chance to do that while you’re racing. Even when you finish, you usually have to go straight to the next race before you get a chance to rest. After the last one, I got sick for the  [ Read More ]

Categories: Chronicles
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Being a Villain isn’t easy.

Posted by Ganondorf On May - 11 - 2011 Comments Off

It may seem simple enough. You invade a country, capture a princess, things like that. But the things that you go through behind the scenes are hard. Running Hyrule while some kid in a green tunic is ruining your plans is not simple. Especially when you go through all the trouble of releasing those things. Have you ever tried to revive an ancient fire dragon while at the same time trying to organize your minions? Or release a monster amoeba to freeze a race of people under a block of ice? It isn’t easy. And when the hero comes and destroys all the work you’ve done, it’s aggravating. There are a lot of times where I wish I could have just gone out to find Link before he had what it took to defeat me. But I was always busy with other things. If it wasn’t letting yet another monster  [ Read More ]

Categories: Complaint
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It pays to be a fairy

Posted by Navi On May - 4 - 2011 Comments Off

When you first look at me, you don’t see much, do you? I don’t look like a threat to anyone, and even when I’ve tried to be intimidating and get right in someone’s face, I’ve heard them say it was just like having a bug in their face once my back was turned. (That sort of talk hurts, by the way. Knock it off.) I don’t need to be big or threatening to be useful, though. You non-smalls out there probably never even think about the sorts of things I can do every day. Sure, I’m pretty good about helping you keep an eye on swift creatures that would hurt you, and I can tell you everything you want to know about them (and lots of stuff you didn’t even know you wanted to know, too!), but I can do a lot more than that. See, think like a spy.  [ Read More ]

Categories: Chronicles